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STRUGGLING TO WRITE

August 6, 2012

The effort that it is taking to get his blog up and running has been a real struggle for me.  Not with finding the  words, I have over three years worth,  but trying to figure out a new computer program.  I am not a computer geek, but I can get around on the keyboard fairly well.  I can handle multi page spreadsheets with formula’s,  I have created multi layered flyers and brochures, as well as  my church bulletin.  I don’t mind a good challenge, but I do prefer to stick with what I know. This program is so completely different from anything I have ever used.   Everyone said that this program would be so easy!   Really??  Where are the pictures that I uploaded?  I know I have created an extra 3 pages, that are nowhere to be found. What button got me to that other page before?  I can’t find it now.  I am sitting here trying to make “something” “anything” work.  It is beginning to be very frustrating, to say the very least! ……… WAIT A MINUTE !!!!!!!!

This must be what life is like for a person suffering from dementia.  Words they want to share, and cannot figure out how to get them conveyed to others.  Unable to get their thoughts to make sense to someone else, they try again in a different way,  they become frustrated,  and then upset, which only makes matters worse, for all involved.  Instead of hitting a “Delete” button, they either shut down, or blow up and become angry.  When talking to a loved one with dementia, we quickly learn to redirect to another subject, to take their mind off of what is upsetting them. I think I will now apply that technique to my blogging issues, and redirect.  Maybe a change of thought will help this situation become better  at another time.

Redirect is a good thing!

From → Alzheimer's, Blogging

3 Comments
  1. Redirecting is probably sound advice and WordPress might not be the easiest thing to use. I am not sure about the pictures. Where did you upload them? or how? I am hiding from my pages. One of which is not being used b/c I have no idea how to get it to work.

    Also, I’d venture to say the difference between a extremely frustrated individual and a demented individual, is knowing that you are frustrated.

    Adieu, scribbler!

  2. This brought tears to my eyes. I know how frustrated I get when the computer will not do what I want it to do, and to think that Grandma is living that frustration everyday, makes me sad. I know how hard it is for me, when the 4 year old is trying to ask questions, or explain what he wants….when I don’t understand, I just say, “I’m sorry, baby, I don’t understand.” Grandma, doesn’t understand that you, ‘don’t understand.’ In this moment….reality hit me. In the rollercoaster of stories you’ve told me on the phone…the good days, the bad days, the silly things Grandma has done….it just really sunk in. My Grandma will never again be the woman that I remember as a child. As I sit here, now sobbing, ready to call my mom to confort me….I realize YOU no longer have that luxury.

    • Lisa, It realy does hurt when reality raises its ugly head, and you discover that life will never be the way we once knew. The only comfort that I can take in this whole ordeal, is that I know that mom is not in distress, like some of the residents in her unit. Some are agitated and anxious ALL the time! Mom is usually calm and complacent, very often happy and laughing, except for those frustrating moments that have her upset and in total turmoil. Ready to fight with anyone who gets close enough to do battle, for no apparent reason. Welcome to my roller coaster world! Love you sweetie!

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